Limits can, however, be discussed after every month or a set period. As a submissive, you shouldn’t be intimidated by your partner when defining boundaries and understand that BDSM is a journey towards exploring your sexuality you should do it in a way that is comfortable for you. Liking or disliking an activity is a personal choice and as a trustworthy dominant, you should respect your partner’s limits at all times. If you are new to BDSM you’ll need your partner to explain a lot of terms in the BDSM checklist anyway. You can later forward the completed checklist to your partner and discuss accordingly. An easier way to figure out limits is to search for an extensive BDSM checklist from the web and fill it out. However, this way you’re bound to miss a lot of activities. ![]() One way to figure them out to is to sit with your dominant and discuss what you both want from your BDSM relationship, then deleting stuff that is no-go. However, if you’re new to the BDSM scene, figuring out boundaries can become confusing. If you’re an experienced BDSM and kink practitioner, you would have most probably figured out your limits. Respecting boundaries contributes to more trust which in turn means a smoother d/s dynamic. From a dominant’s perspective, respecting the limits of a submissive as important as a part of the deal as any other in a dominant-submissive relationship. If your submissive says that they do not have a limit and are ready to explore anything you imagine of throwing at them during a scene, they’re either lying or haven’t explored their submissive side as much. Hard limits, on the other hand, are those that cannot be negotiated. ![]() Since BDSM is all about pushing your comfort zone, soft limits are those that can be experimented with, with the consent of course. ![]() In addition to the difference of nature of limits and boundaries that BDSM partners might define, limits can be divided into two broad categories: soft and hard. Like many other things in BDSM and kink, limits can be potentially infinite and depends on the factors that have contributed to building your personality. Knowing where you’d like boundaries drawn means when you finally have a partner you don’t have to ponder on what your limits are can focus on maintaining and contributing to your d/s dynamic. Some may argue it is actually a prerequisite of a BDSM relationship, as important as knowing what you want from your d/s dynamic. However, knowing your boundaries is important regardless of if you have a BDSM partner or on-going relationship or not. Limits, kink, and BDSM go hand in hand when it comes to relationships between a submissive and their dominant.
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